I’ve been on a roll! So just one more chat about why we tend to buy and accumulate clutter, and then I promise to take a break from this topic. Though the idea may be getting dry, the basic belief is that if less items are amassed, that’s less to clean up, less to organize and ultimately, more time for you. Yay! So let’s continue to dive into the clutter causes and buying bonanzas.
It was about 8:30 on Monday night, and I had a task scheduled in my planner. Mind you, this was a task I was not excited about, as it had to do with sitting at my computer and figuring out an aspect of technology. I am not especially tech savvy. Now, I’m not the most helpless human being, but I do shout out for my 15-year old son and rely on my tech genius hubby way too often. The feminist in me cringes about this while the loving mom and wife embraces the help.
Accompanying this self proclaimed computer incompetence was all the thoughts about how hard this was going to be and how much it was going to suck. Now I don’t know if it was my mother, Albus Dumbledore, or some other wise sage who said, “Don’t believe everything you think,” but that would have been a great mantra to apply. As it turns out, I had everything figured out within twenty minutes of sitting down. Well, back up…the actual work itself took about twenty minutes. The time I spent on Amazon and other sites, wasting time beforehand, extended the whole endeavor a lot longer.
You see, what sometimes incites me to buy online stems from Fear of Process. What’s this Fear of Process you ask? Why this little buddy is sometimes a great cause of procrastination, and in my case, purchasing. When we have anxiety about a task we are uncertain of doing, building up fear in our head, making it out to be much worse than it actually is, that my friends, is Fear of Process. Instead of just sitting down and starting the task at hand, we (either subconsciously or consciously) think of a gazillion other things we must do to put it off. And then the work we need to accomplish only looms larger and more worrisome.
Because much of my Fear of Process tends to be digital related, I am often at the computer when it rears its ugly head.
“Oh, I need to order that dehydrated coconut milk from Amazon,” I’ll say to myself, leading me down the rabbit hole of online buying, spurring me on to other sites.
Why dehydrated coconut milk is of vital importance at that exact moment would normally be the question of the day, but now we know it’s the darn FOP!
What I’m proud of now, is that I can actually identify when this is happening. Awareness is key. When I know I have a task at hand that I am nervous about or intimidated by, I give myself a little pep talk ahead of time. It goes something like this:
“Jen, just like Mary Poppins says, ‘Well begun is half done!’ Just get this started and when you are finished, you will not only feel amazing but if you feel the need to order dehydrated coconut milk, by all means, do so.”
I make sure my glass dry erase board is near by (remember that doo-dad from an earlier post?) and any thoughts that might pop up to distract me are written on the board to be dealt with later. Then I dive into my task, fear and all. And if I have to call for some help too, there’s no shame in that.
Chances are, Fear of Process may be sabotaging your work and accumulating clutter for you, as well. Give yourself that pep talk and blast that FOP out of the water. Your daily planners, pocketbooks and self esteem will thank you. Amazon…not so much.